Life Identity Crisis... It's Inevitable
In a recent article I read, it announced that people surveyed in United States, India, UK and Australia (one of these things does not belong) are increasingly getting anxious and overwhelmed in life when they are not making enough money, not doing stuff they love, and not connecting with people in their jobs. Seems fairly obvious.
In the province of British Columbia where I live, much of the conversation these days is on the housing crisis, which I believe correlates to these three metrics very well, i.e can’t afford the house if you don’t have the money from the job; can’t live your passion (or so the belief is) as it doesn’t provide the immediate security; can’t connect with the people if you are spending too much time on technology or being forced to work remotely (or choosing…)
I would say we could scrap the mid-life and the quarter-life as a label as these are really just ways to refer to the different generations going through the same crisis. The crisis is cross generational and for the youth it breeds more on the fear spectrum about not having in the future and on the opposite end for the older generations, fear shifts to guilt and resentment about not doing enough in the past.
Regardless of how old you are, a crisis of identity is always possible and is always showing you the voids that require attention in your life.
For example, we will hear mid-life crisis referring to the baby-boomers who reach the pinnacle of their career (or so they thought) and they begin to question everything and desperately seek changes to try to feel more fulfilled. We hear about the quarter-life crisis referring to the millennials who haven’t even got through a majority of their working lives to find that they are outright dissatisfied as soon as they enter into the workforce, no wonder. Both of these groups have a difficult time feeling their basic survival is met, they may lack authentic connection, and most likely they are not doing what their Souls are requiring of them. This is suffering and in the Corporate sense leads to turnover, poor production, and conflict.
In the West we will find most of this crisis stems from both a root fear around money and the grim consequences of not having enough money, as well from a Spiritual void that exists. We may find the mid-lifers going out and buying a sexy new car because they are looking for something material (what they know) to fill in immaterial gaps (what they do not know).
Material can NEVER fill a Spiritual void, and thus leads to dissatisfaction in purchase, and can also be accompanied by incredible regret needing to pay debt back for something that you truly cannot find value in (another article for another day.)
Regardless of your beliefs we were all innately created to have a Spiritual connection and experience. This does not however imply that we need a religious experience (someone or something telling us what to do or how to be.) When we feel like we have enough, when we feel like we are authentically connected, heard and seen, and when we are living from a place of love and passion then we’re good right?
Well not according to our material belief system that is in place that says:
"People who are fine with what they have, fulfilled in connection, and living their passion will not consume at the same rate and therefore industry will crumble. "
Do you see the resistance the balancing is up against?
It’s easy to say that industry shouldn’t have been there in the first place, forcing us to consume and jeopardize our health and the planet’s sustainability, but in order to grow as an individual and a collective we must first experience what we are not, also known as the law of opposites or duality in some Spiritual traditions. If you want to experience true Prosperity, you must experience a feeling of lack, and when I say feel it is not enough just to be broke, but to truly feel broke. Thankfully prosperity is on the other side of this.
We often hear parents tell their kids that they should feel grateful or lucky, or better yet being forced to say Thank You for something they don’t truly appreciate because they have not experienced an opposite experience. They have no ability to contrast what or how they should feel without feeling it. We also hear parents tell their kids to stop crying, suck it up, don’t cry you’re okay, so in an essence they are being taught not to feel. If we cannot feel, how can we navigate back to a balanced life?
In my life, I am so grateful for money because it keeps us fed, clothed, warm, and provides amazing experiences for us, but I could not come to this deep appreciation without experiencing times of hardship and lack, and FEELING this lack deep within my being.
In Third World countries, we often see areas starvation or areas without adequate resources to make a sustainable living. But ironically, in some of these most dire of areas they are seemingly happy and fulfilled. They are on the opposite end of the spectrum and are drinking up their connection with Spirit but void of the Material.
The younger generations in North America are coming in more in-tune with their Spiritual connections (even if they are not aware) so they are reminded of these voids a lot earlier in life, hence the quarter-life crisis compared to mid. Again, same crisis, there is a void.
Organizationally remedying the crisis will come from a joint-efffort and mutual accountability between the individual employee and the leadership team or Organizational entity as a whole. The employee brings in its own crisis of identity while witnessing the Organization struggling with its own. If we as individuals step out of the crisis and our leaders are still evidently in it, we cannot feel inspired, in fact we will feel repulsed. Likewise if the leadership makes positive changes that we are not ready for, we will not stick around much longer, sometimes this is a very good thing for both parties. Change cannot be forced, both sides need to be willing, able and accountable to observe what is causing the crisis and be willing and curious as to understand whether that serves them anymore. If not, out it goes!
We see some of these Eastern Countries coming into balance as they adopt more Americanized ways of living, which to some might be aggravating, but balance on this planet is about balance in the Physical and the Spiritual. There is no separation between the two and for those that can identify and come into alignment with this neutrality, great empowerment emerges.
There is also no defining what balance is all about or how it should unfold as I write about in The Discomfort of Coming into Balance . Being without material would indicate the natural balancing is to experience materialism in some degree and inevitably merging with the Spiritual. No one knows materialism better than the West. No one knows spirituality like the East (although it can be said that our Indigenous Cultures did, but they got obliterated – more on this another day.)
I am right now trying to find balance in coming into a way of Being which is so drastically opposite from how I was brought up with a heavy material dominant focus. I am living in between two fairly pronounced worlds. Spirituality besides being forced to go to Church was vacant from my life. As I find balance, I find much contradiction in the way I have lived and am trying to find acceptance in this rather than resentment, although acceptance does not mean bypassing pain and emotional experience. This is all part and parcel of the experience I signed up for. If I want to continue on this plain of existence I must find acceptance in the merging of the two worlds.
Crisis is happening on a large scale as we are forced to view whether this is who we identify with on an inner level and what changes we can make in a sea of contradiction that is all around us.
Crisis is inevitable with balance, but it does not mean that the effects and consequences cannot be mitigated and navigated optimally for your highest good.
If you lack of prosperity, purpose or connection are creating voids in your life, feel free to reach out for a Co-Creative Coaching session where we can map and vision out a path together that has you Empowered, Inspired, and Clear to Create Anything. firstname.lastname@example.org
Jon Martin ~ See, Feel, Know your Channels of Flow
Empowering and Inspiring Individuals to Clearly and Consciously Co-Create Anything. With Purpose and Passion. For life.